Why can’t I be happy with myself

Why can't I be happy with myself-

Friday night, Jay challenged me to say “I’m happy with the progress I’ve made” out loud, to myself.  Would you have a hard time saying that out loud? Even to yourself?  I did. It was incredibly difficult. It took a conversation that lasted a couple

Why marriage ruins sex

Sometimes it can seem like marriage ruins sex. After getting married, many people notice that sex becomes routine, boring and just not that exciting.  Yes, the spouses with the stronger drive will still have a strong desire for sex, but it’s often not the same as

Never use absolute accusations

Never use absolute accusations

Most, if not all of you, have been in a conversation where you or your spouse start a sentence with either “You never … ” or You always …”.  These absolute accusations should never be used in conflict and here’s why: 1. It’s not fair fighting

Divorce is contagious

I heard something the other day while listening to a talk by Jenna McCarthy.  Divorce is contagious!  And the first thing I thought was “What?  That’s ridiculous!” But it turns out that having close friends who get divorced increases your own chance of divorce by

5 reasons your marriage isn’t growing

Over the years, I’ve noticed a trend.  Those marriages that are healthy can handle growing even more, but there are many marriages, especially Christian ones, where they remain locked in the status quo.  They know it could be better, but they lack the skills, characteristics

6 ways to ensure you have a terrible sex life

If you haven’t heard yet, I’m planning to run a webinar in the near future. If you have a preference on the topic, you should fill out this form to vote. Currently, the topic people want to hear about most is how to have a

Christian Sex Surveys

Talking about sex survey

I was going to write a post today about talking about sex with your spouse, but I want to get some data first.  So, let’s see how many responses we can get in the next week. You can fill out the survey here to share your

Have you prepared your kids for the first time they will see porn?

Your children will watch porn.  Does that thought terrify you?  It did for me the first time I thought it.  And before you think, “No, I can keep them from it”, I’m sad to say you can’t.  Not in this world that they’re growing up

How to survive a growth season in your marriage

How to survive a growth season in your marriage

If you’ve been married for a few years, you probably know that marriages have seasons. Some are fun, some are exciting.  Some are amazing and intense.  Some are a bit dull.  When you’re just slogging through life, and some are a bit more oppressive than

Sex is not icing on the cake

Sex is not icing on the cake, it’s the eggs in the cake

There’s been a saying in Christian circles that’s been driving me crazy for a while now. You’ve probably heard it. I know I did many times before I got married. “Sex is not that important. It’s just icing on the cake.”  Or some variant of

Making your spouse earn sex makes you feel like a prostitute

Making your spouse earn sex can make you feel like a prostitute

We see a lot of people in Christianity saying that men have to earn the right to have sex with their wife.  While I believe the advice is well-intentioned, and may even be practical, it is not biblical and it leads to some serious issues.