Definition: Spanking, within the context of sexual activity, refers to the consensual act of one partner lightly striking the other's buttocks often as a form of erotic stimulation or play.
Topics include:
Exhibitionism
No sex in 4 months
Should I disclose previous porn struggles to fiancee
Other resources
What qualifies as mutual masturbation
Need rougher sex to orgasm
During July and a bit of August, we ran a survey about people’s BDSM experiences. Depending on who you ask, it was either extensive or just dipping our toes into the topic. In the end, we received over 1,000 complete responses from a wide range of couples, some for whom BDSM is part of their daily life, others who were engaging in BDSM activities didn’t think what they were doing qualified, others who wished they were doing such things but didn’t know how to start, and those who thought it was disgusting that I even considered asking questions about such a topic.
or the last three weeks, I’ve spent evenings and weekends digging through the data, coding it, doing pivot tables, building charts, running correlation formulas, and more, trying to get what I can out of it. It’s aptly called data mining because often it feels like sifting through a lot of rocks and dirt just to try and find a nugget of something valuable contained.
Today, I’m going to share what I found.
Last week, Gary Thomas posted an article on his substack on the topic of discipline vs. punishment—not taking a stance but rather offering it up as a controversial conversation starter. Reading it made me curious about something—does your view of hell change your parenting approach? After all, if God is our example, and you believe that hell is eternal punishment, does that then lend to a more heavy-handed approach to parenting versus someone who believes that hell is an act of mercy?
I posted that question in our forum, and it then led to a discussion on using physical punishment on children. I spent a fair bit of time in the last week or two writing on that thread, and so I thought I’d repurpose it here for those who might be curious about how we raised our children.
We, Christina and I, don’t believe hell is eternal torture. We don’t believe such a view is in keeping with the Bible. We grew up in a denomination that taught it was, and it was one of the reasons we left because the doctrine couldn’t stand up to either biblical scrutiny or logic as we saw it. If you want to know why and/or argue that stance, I fully welcome you to read the post What happens when you die? That’s not the point of this post.
The point of this post is to share why we don’t spank our children, and now that my children are growing up into adults, what the outcome of such a choice has been.
Topics include:
Does my wife know what I’m doing to her?
I want to share orgasms with my husband
What are your thoughts on BDSM?
Is bondage a problem for me?
Wife doesn’t like direct clitoral stimulation
How do I hold my wife accountable?
Topics include:
Wife becoming less adventurous
How long before porn memories fade?
What counts as premature ejaculation?
Is getting a vasectomy a sin?
Husband isn’t acting like a believer
Is it okay to talk about sex?
Are we going too far?
Sex frequency has gone down
Crossdressing men
Rimming
Sex once or twice per year since kids were born
Conflict over anal play
CBD Lube
Spanking
Masturbation for medical reasons
Is masturbation okay if your spouse can’t participate?
Will masturbation keep me out of heaven?
A reader asks:
I enjoy calling my husband “Sir” in bed, as we enjoy our submissive/dominant roles in marriage to be played out in sex as well. He felt weird about it at first, but now loves it. I read your post a while ago where you mentioned that humiliation isn’t good for your partner in the long term. Would you consider this to be humiliation? What about the trend to call men “daddy” in bed?
Topics Include:
Sex Drives Changing
How to Squirt
Wife is into whipping
Anal sex tips
Single & erections
Low drive wife secretly masturbating
Secret Facebook profiles
Porn addiction ruining relationships
Wife can go months without sex
Husband with Asperger’s
Sex just a checklist item
Oral sex not reciprocated
Are online affairs cheating?
Responsive desire isn’t an abnormality, disability or curse. It’s a blessing. Once you learn to work with it, it can actually lead to an amazing sex life.
Answering questions from our readers. Questions include:
Is doggy style demeaning?
Does anal sex always cause bleeding?
How to start talking about sex with a sensitive wife?
Can you have sex with an unsaved spouse?
How to handle a wife orgasming too quickly
Mutual Masturbation
Swallowing your own semen
Can you be married to the wrong person?
Is sexlessness being unfaithful?
Ethical porn
Did you ever play the game “memory” or “concentration” as a child or maybe with your children? Or maybe you new it by another name. You put cards or tiles face down on the table and took turns turning them over, trying to find matches.For this Valentine’s Day we decided to make an adult version of this game to play with your spouse that can also be used as foreplay.
A common question among Christians is “What is allowed in the bedroom?” or “Are there any activities we’re not allowed to do during sex?” This is a confusing topic, mostly, because we (the church) have made it confusing. I think the Bible is pretty clear on