Category Archives: Initiating


Confidence is sexy

I caused a bit of a stir yesterday with my post Romance is the death of sexual attraction.  This is sort of a part two, but not the part two I think a lot of people were expecting.  In short, if you don’t want to

Being clean for sex

I’ve seen a bunch of comments lately on the topic of being clean for sex. Here’s a few I’d noticed just in the last couple of days: i would like to hear about shower / bath before sex. is it common? is it done in

Discussion about initiating sex

We’re going to try something a bit different today, we’re going to try a discussion question.  Basically, I’m not going to write a post, I’m just going to ask a couple of questions and open the floor to comments below. Because sometimes I get questions

Initiation only counts if your spouse recognizes it

My wife and I were talking about people’s responses to yesterday’s post.  Our conversation let to what initiation was.  We had just had sex, and I mentioned that I had initiated that encounter.  Initially she disagreed saying “I came to bed naked”.  I countered saying

Be Authentic about your Sexual Desire

I get a lot of emails from spouses.  I get to read about a lot of marriages in those emails.  I get to read about how spouses react, how they think, their struggles, their concerns, their hopes, their fears.  One of the big struggles I