All posts by Jay Dee

SWM 101 – Why does my spouse always push for more during sex?

Answering this question:

Jay, I enjoyed the book (Introduction to Talking Dirty) that my hubby put on my iPad. The thing is, no matter what I do in my comfort zone, it isn’t enough. I do many, I mean many, of the examples you use, even the F WORD. How do I get him to be grateful for what I do instead of needing more? I always feel inadequate.

SWM 096 – Why men being submissive is problematic

A post in response to this question:

Hi. I wanted to know if there is any reason that the man can’t be the submissive part sometimes during sex. Because I feel like I want to be submissive from time to time, but I don’t want to ask my wife because it’s an awkward topic.

SWM 094 – Who is more righteous?

A reader poses a question:
There are two people. The first person participates in the modern Sexual Marketplace by dating around, having a series of mid-to-long-term relationships that involve sex, and having a few hookups, but ends up in a stable marriage and has children by his mid-to-late twenties. The second person follows Biblical Courtship (or whatever you want to call it), saves sex for marriage, only courts/dates Christians, but never finds a spouse and ends up as a 40-year-old childless virgin.
Who was the more righteous of the two?

SWM 093 – Crossdressing, counseling not working, should I share fantasies, facial hair, Viagra for women and many more

Answering Anonymous Questions about Married Sex

Topics include:
Crossdressing
Counseling not fixing her sex drive
Should I keep fantasies to myself?
Husband addicted to porn
Wife has no sex drive
FaceTime sex
Spouse’s facial and body hair
Does Viagra work for women?
How do I stop her from seeing me as submissive?
No sex due to pregnancy complications
Wife struggles with overeating
How do I stop masturbating?
Anal fisting

SWM 092 – How do you know if you’ve had an orgasm

A reader asked:
If the number of women who reach orgasm from penetrative sex is as low as the surveys that you mention say it is, how would a couple know if the woman is one of those that doesn’t orgasm with penetration? For context, I have been married to my wife for 13 years and we have 5 children…I would say our sex life isn’t dry but we aren’t all that creative. There have been things that I have suggested doing and have tried but she has told me that they make her uncomfortable (things like me using my hands to pleasure her or go down on her). I think there may be something connected to past experiences with masturbation and the guilt that came with that as a teen…but I have taken the position of wanting to serve and honor her so I haven’t pushed it. So, for the past 13 years, we have kind of been doing the same thing once every other week or so. A part of me wonders if the lack of desire on her part is because she hasn’t ever really had an orgasm…but that raises the other question of how are we to know? Kind of a silly question I guess, but something I have been pondering while listening to your podcast. Thanks.