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Category Archives: Physical Intimacy

Sex is not icing on the cake

Sex is not icing on the cake, it’s the eggs in the cake

There’s been a saying in Christian circles that’s been driving me crazy for a while now. You’ve probably heard it. I know I did many times before I got married. “Sex is not that important. It’s just icing on the cake.”  Or some variant of

Why am I always the one who has to initiate sex?

This past week, we were having a discussion in our Uncovering Intimacy Champions group.  I won’t post the full start of the conversation because I haven’t asked if I could, but the gist of it was this:  How do you keep initiating sex when your spouse,

I'll never be good enough

I’ll never be good enough

When we started fixing our marriage and my wife realized how important sex was both to me and to our relationship, we started improving our physical relationship.  We had sex more often, and it was more varied.  We both enjoyed the changes. However, a discussion

Sex Within Marriage Podcast - UncoveringIntimacy.com

SWM029 – Fantasy affairs, anal sex, golden showers, work during sex and low drives

Episode 29 of the podcast.  Here are the questions I’m answering today: Question 1 194 – My question is about lust. Here’s my problem. I absolutely adore my wife

Why do I smell bad (down there) after we've had sex?

Why do I smell bad (down there) after we’ve had sex?

There are many women who suffer from this condition, an unpleasant smell or odour after sex, sometimes for days or even a week afterwards.  Here’s a question about it from one of our readers: I have a question I have wondered about for years. This

How do I open up to my spouse sexually?

How do I open up to my spouse sexually?

Here’s a question that’s very important to me, because it’s one that is beginning of something wonderful in a marriage.  I’ve gotten it so many times over the years that I wrote an entire course around it. How do I open up to my spouse

External events can stop a sex session from going anywhere

External events can stop a sex session from going anywhere

For many spouses, external events can negatively affect the sexual context.  This generally is the wife, but not always, as this reader’s question shows: We are working through a sexual refusal pattern in marriage and we are making good progress. Last night I pointed out

Your relationship has to be based on more than just sex

Your relationship has to be based on more than just sex

I was talking with Keelie from LoveHopeAdventure.com today and we got into a conversation about intimacy.  In particular, about intimacy while dating.  It ended up being a good discussion, and so I thought I’d share what I shared with her because this affects not only couples

Why lower-drive spouses should initiate sex

One of the largest, and yet least talked about, struggles in marriage is the difference in sex drives.  Often one spouse ends up doing the bulk of the initiating and pushing for a more varied and passionate sex life.  Often, this ends up with a

Is this what an orgasm feels like to everyone else?

Is this what an orgasm feels like to everyone else?

I’ve been playing with a new chat feature on the website, and it’s been interesting to talk to some of my readers.  Here’s a question I received this week and I asked if I could write a post about it.: Hi! I’ve got an odd

Orgasming from oral sex survey results

A couple of weeks ago, I started running a survey to answer the question of one of the people in my Uncovering Intimacy Champions group.  Namely “How many men can’t orgasm from oral sex”.  Well, I expanded it a bit to answer a few more